Who is Mary Sue?
- (originally in fan fiction) a type of female character who is depicted as unrealistically lacking in flaws or weaknesses."she was not a ‘strong woman’ so much as an insufferable Mary Sue"
Science fiction, urban fantasy, horror. Writing, reviews, queerness. Observations from the nest.
I've currently got COVID - it doesn't look serious so far, but it's certainly annoying, and I'm homebound. However, I thought you all might enjoy having a look at this.
My article on polyamory and OT3s
I'm hoping to get more articles out this year (I know, again) so stay tuned to this space for more writing advice, media thoughts, and the occasional bit of personal stuff.
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Michelle Browne is a sci fi/fantasy writer and editor. She lives in Lethbridge, AB with her spouses and their cats. Her days revolve around freelance editing, knitting, jewelry, and learning too much. She is currently working on other people’s manuscripts, the next books in her series, and drinking as much tea as humanly possible.
Find her all over the internet: * OG Blog * Mailing list * Magpie Editing * Amazon * Medium * Twitter * Instagram * Facebook * Tumblr * Paypal.me * Ko-fi
...And that's where I've been. The last six months have been hectic because of it. However, you can look forward to an article that mentions my marriage in July's edition of Apex. Keep your eyes peeled!
Although this isn't a wedding blog, and although I try to take a light touch with mentioning personal things, I wanted to take some time to talk about what I'm putting together and how it's happening. Because my wife-to-be is in a sensitive field, I will keep photos of her out of this post.
Some of you may have read "The Underlighters" or "The Loved, The Lost, The Dreaming," which features an alternate ending for the storyline of the same book. A central feature of that tale is the triad romance between Janelle, Una, and Nathu. Polyamory, the practice (and orientation) of having multiple romantic or significant relationships, is also going to be a theme that I explore in all of my series in other ways. When I wrote that book nearly a decade ago, I didn't expect that I'd find myself in a similar relationship some day, but to my great joy and surprise, that's the case.
My long-time male partner Andrey (aka Disarcade) has been mentioned a few times. Some years ago, when we moved from Calgary to Lethbridge, we made a friend, whom I'll call Starling. Our friendship continued through Dungeons and Dragons and art, and when the pandemic hit, we were close enough that we decided to share a small bubble, with a couple of other people.
The pandemic meant that we spent a lot of time together, and only grew closer. There was a personal incident with my family that she was very supportive through, and that was an immense help. As the dream of home ownership was offered to us and then snatched away, talking to her made us all realise how well our life plans dovetailed.
Between the time and the converging goals, love had rich soil, and sent down its roots. It's been an exhilarating, sometimes challenging ride, but I couldn't be happier that in January, when I asked her to be my wife, and marry us both, she said yes.
Although plural marriages are not legally recognized - mostly due to the stigma surrounding polygamous marriages, which are different and often based in oppressive religious structures - we're having a handfasting ceremony to recognize our connection to each other.
The blog More Than Two has some great resources and information about what polyamory is and how it works, but for those not acquainted, it's a type of non-normative relationship structure that can take many forms - including non-monogamy, relationship anarchy, and many other shapes. In our triad, all of us have relationships with each other and together, but that's not the only way to love, either. It's also not the same as swinging, which is generally about sexual interactions, but not emotional ones.
Although polyamory is seen as non-normative (and is not just a lifestyle, but is an orientation which is discriminated against, meaning that it's on the LGBTQ+ spectrum), polyplatonic relationships are very normal - most people have more than a single friend or even best friend. Anyone wondering "how that works" on a basic level should consider how they can feel affection for multiple family members or friends. It's a good reference point for the similarities. And just as caring about one friend usually doesn't reduce your affection for another - unless there's a problem in the other relationship - loving two or more people doesn't mean loving each person any less.
I might diverge from my usual pop culture, politics, and writing technique content to mention some of the creative stuff; let me know if you readers would be interested in an article about how we put together an unusual outdoor summer wedding for under $5000.
We've been DIYing up a storm - and if I was cleverer, I'd have posted a bunch of tutorials and progress shots on here - but preparations are almost ready. I've had a very messy release schedule for a long time now, but my mental health has been improving, and I'd like to put out more articles. I'm hoping to get some more published articles out as well, with places like Apex and even possibly other magazines.
But for the next couple of days, until the solstice and the ceremony, my biggest focus is going to be on finishing up some final details, making food for guests, and cleaning the apartment! You would not believe the amount of glitter my fiancée produces. Seriously, there's so much glitter stuck in the carpet, on the couch, the dresses...
Oh, and book 5 is still coming along, too. I have an author event at Analog Books on August 30th here in Lethbridge, AB, so if you're a local, come out and see me that night! I'll have copies of the books mentioned here, and will be reading excerpts from those and my upcoming work, the fifth book in the Meaning Wars saga, the grand finale. When that's done, an omnibus paperback edition will be released, containing the whole series.
Yeah, that's a lot. It's ambitious. But if my girlfriend, and soon-to-be wife, has taught me anything, it's that it's worth living life adventurously.
So, you might have noticed a bit of a lack of blog posts over the winter. Well, this time it's not (just) depression eating me alive. I made a thing - two things, actually.
Consider this a soft reboot, and a perfectly good starting point in the series. Book 3, The Meaning Wars, follows two characters: Sarah, the weary Behavioural Criminal arrested for associating with dissidents, and Crystal, a wormhole engineer dissatisfied with her marriage and the safe, boring jobs she's been taking. Linked by friendship and their Martian origins, the two women fight ongoing trauma to reclaim their senses of self.
Book 4, Poe's Outlaws, finds Crystal and Sarah pursuing intersecting paths. Sarah has become a smuggler, wrapped up in a rescue mission to save a revolutionary leader (who happens to be her inspiration and her crush). Crystal is taking a much-needed vacation, but an old flame, the one who got away, is about to throw her life right back into chaos. The only way out? Friendship, teamwork, and possibly, a revolution. It's a beach episode featuring queer love, aliens, and derring-do.
I'm working on book 5, A Jade's Trick. I'm past the halfway point, but for a few months, I got completely stuck. Part of it was debating on the tone for the ending. War threatens, and I had no idea how to resolve the conflict. Should I choose something idealistic, where the corrective safeguards of the system work, or something drastic and grim, a more realistic vision of power dynamics? I couldn't choose, and it felt like a very abstract question.
Then war came to Ukraine, and I got a tiny taste of what it might be like to stand in Crystal's boots.
Being in the late? portion of a pandemic, as very hurried politicians insist we are, and having that pandemic overlap with the disruptive attack on the American election (followed recently by a halfassed attempt to do the same here in Canada, with the farcical embarrassment of the trucker protests) [links], I wasn't exactly expecting more calamities. But the universe isn't really into following scripts or plot arcs or anything sensible like that - no, those are human constructs meant to carve chaos into coherence. I wasn't counting on a paranoid, ruthless dictator deciding that the lull after the second pandemic Olympics was the perfect time for his colonial power-grab.
And I really wasn't prepared for the war to affect me personally. In addition to the fact that my male partner is Ukrainian, a very dear friend is a Kievan native. She has been displaced by the conflict, and she and her mother are scrabbling to make ends meet in a different city. Hopefully, this displacement won't be permanent.
We've set up a fundraiser to help her and her mom while these events are going on. This is a fundraiser to help her and her mom not only get a tablet for her to work on as a graphic designer (her laptop is in Kyiv...), but also to help them get by for the next while. Her mother's job at the library is kind of out of commission right now, and it's possible that they'll have to emigrate elsewhere for safety.
Before this whole war thing got started, I also knitted her a sweater inspired by Yoongi of BTS's famous - and expensive - designer yellow sweater. Proceeds from the sale of the pattern will also be going directly to Katya, to help with resettlement costs. There is a chance that we're going to have to help her migrate to Canada, so anything you can give will be greatly valued.
Thank you all for reading my work and checking out these fundraisers. If you can't give, please share this article on social media.
Okay, so not long ago, I put out a post (written in November, actually...) about the internet getting meaner. Since then, I've been wracking my brain about why it's happening.
Then I developed a theory that made it all snap into place.
Art by Michelle Browne. |
It might be a subculture issue - for example, tabletop roleplay game (TTRPG) Twitter is pretty mad at Critical Role right now because their opening credits feature arguably colonialist imagery/fantasies, and some have argued that its Marquet setting is supporting/pushing orientalism. (Orientalism is the term for the Western artistic fascination with "The East," conflating a whole mess of cultures that include everything from Anatolians and Turks to Egyptians and Iranians, all the way to to Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese cultural elements, and more.)
I can't really debate this argument because I'm not a SWANA (South-West Asian and/or North African) or SEA (South-East Asian) person, but I would say that there's only so much any particular work of media can do to unpack the entire legacy of colonialism. Change is always going to be incremental; even revolutions leave a lot of paperwork in their wake.
However, there is something interesting about a good-faith effort being taken as cynical, false, and ill-willed. It's not the first time I've watched something like that happen, either - particularly on Twitter, which thrives on anger, because its algorithm says it has to.
So - just posting on Twitter to vent or be angry is kind of inherently dangerous on that basis alone - it's more likely that you might go viral just when you're vulnerable. Add in a mixture of people interacting in bad faith, and the recipe for conflict is already spicy. But what about people who see themselves as inherently just, or fighting for the right cause? Surely we've all been that person, who signal-boosted a conflict because it seemed important, or weighed in with their two cents. Sometimes, or frequently, the target of that ire may be a person or group with whom we usually would agree - except for this time, or a few other times, of course...
To survive in a system hostile to our existence, many marginalized people have to learn the art of reading subtext. People with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and those who have survived trauma and/or abuse also tend to be members of marginalized groups - and reading the subtle tells of people acting abusively tends to train in hypersensitivity. Unfortunately, that hypersensitivity and the rampant lack of mental health care and resources means that many marginalised people are extremely jumpy, even around each other. The casual abuses of the world around us trains us to default to paranoid readings of the words and writing of mainstream culture. After all, being openly homophobic/queerphobic, openly racist, or openly discriminatory in other ways is punished socially, or at least awkward - but passive-aggression or more subtle jabs abound. Not noticing these things can be harmful to us, so unfortunately, we tend to default to paranoid readings of situations - even when creators, content makers, or other internet strangers are acting in good faith.
Speaking of abusive or discriminatory environments, it's also true that a lot of leftists in North America have come from culturally Christian backgrounds. Even if we've moved away from that lifestyle and religion, the logic and classification system remains in our minds - the moral hierarchy of goodness and badness, of evil and moral rightness. And unfortunately, that system is pretty lopsided and badly balanced. After all, we're talking about the system of beliefs wherein - particularly for evangelical Christianity - anal sex is about on par with sexual assault; robbery with being overly proud of yourself; and murder, on par with masturbation.
Well - that's a complex topic, but technically, they're all sins. Sure, some admit that not all sins are equally bad - but they're all considered sinful. There's more to it than that, sure, but from a lay-Christian perspective, the sin thing is persistent. We are all sinners before God, and ultimately, only He can forgive us - so the rhetoric goes.
Now substitute in "problematic" for the word "sinful." Suddenly, certain behavioural patterns make an uncomfortable amount of sense. There is also no God-figure or representational stand-in, such as a priest or pastor, to act as a forgiver or mediator of transgressions for those of us in the social justice sphere. There is the crowd - whose reactions are cherry-picked by the algorithm to show their worst side - and that's about it. Thus, we may turn to the crowd in hopes of forgiveness, but without leaders (or even a belief in leadership), that just results in a wall of diverse opinions.
I'm not saying we need leaders or arbiters of forgiveness, because that's inherently a system of power that seems both ineffective and dangerous, but it's worth being conscious of our roots so that we can understand the flaws in our own rhetoric and belief structures.
And hey, it's a lot easier to be less suspicious of others when we understand the flaws and dangers of our own perspectives - and the way our mental health issues and backgrounds colour our perspective. Slowing down and giving others the benefit of the doubt takes time, practice, and discipline - but once the habit is created, life becomes so much more relaxing.